Baby, Baby, Baby?

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Justin Bieber has graced the walls and t-shirts of girls everywhere, but now he is about to grace the cover of Star Magazine.  Sadly, the focus will not be on his new Christmas album, which released yesterday but on a paternity lawsuit. Mariah Yeater claims Justin is the father of her three month old baby–  20 year old Mariah says the two had unprotected sex after a concert at the Staples Center last year.

Justin Bieber and his camp deny any allegations of the paternity of Mariah Yeater’s baby.

Justin Bieber took to twitter saying:

Justin Bieber

@justinbieberJustin Bieber
so Im going to ignore the rumors…and focus on what is real. an opportunity to help by doing what i love. Judge me on the music! Love yall!
@justinbieberJustin Bieber
with this album Im giving portion of the proceeds to #charity … Im trying to help #GIVEBACK..nothing will stop me from that focus. NOTHING
The story told by Mariah, would make Justin 16 and Mariah 19 at the time.
Will this story takeaway from his new album? Last night Justin apperared on Dancing With Stars alongside Boys II Men, singing one of the songs off his new album.  It seems as though Bieber is trying to keep focused on his music.
How will you deal with the media storm that is going to take place around Justin Bieber?  Will you let this effect your Belieber?  Does this open up a discussion for you and your teenager?

IT’S COMPLICATED: The Do’s and Don’ts of Facebook

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By Baaria Chaudhary

My generation is the first generation to grow up with Facebook. To us, innovations like the iPad or the Kindle are nothing new. In our minds, it’s just another way to access technology. Maybe that is the problem. New technology is being invented so quickly these days that we barely have time to catch up before the Next Big Thing. My generation is the experiment to see how technology such as social media is going to impact the future. There are no set restrictions yet, no guidelines on how we should proceed with all this new technology. This can be exceptionally dangerous, especially when it comes to social networking sites like Facebook. Since we aren’t given a set rule of guidelines on how to act on Facebook, we automatically assume that there aren’t any. But this isn’t necessarily true.

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I have to admit I got annoyed when my parents told me to be careful on Facebook. What’s the harm? I’d ask myself but even as I would say it, I would recall incidents in school of Facebook related drama. The problem with Facebook is that it is so much easier to say things to people on Facebook than to say them face to face. We all fall victim to this. Soon, little things will lead to big things, which will lead to even bigger things, and the next thing we know, we’ve invented an entire alter ego for ourselves on Facebook –one that isn’t necessarily grounded in reality. This creates a major problem on Facebook. We can never really tell if a person on Facebook is actually who they say they are. Not knowing whom you are really talking to yet trusting them anyways can lead to problems that can leak into real life. There are so many reported incidents of people being harassed in real life because of Facebook. One such example can be found in Seventeen Magazine’s  [Delete] Digital Drama Campaign. The magazine recently teamed up with ABC to raise awareness for cyberbullying. In one of their spreads, they showed how “friending” a teacher on Facebook could lead to unwanted consequences. This is just one thing that you have to be careful about when going on Facebook. Don’t just accept friend requests just because you know the person or you go to school with them. You should keep your school, work, and social life separate from one another on Facebook, too. If you add someone who isn’t necessarily in your family or social circle, you are beginning to blur the boundary lines.

Not only should you be aware of inconsistency on Facebook, but you should also remember the phrase “think before you speak.” Just because there isn’t any cyberbullying going on towards you doesn’t mean you should be the one to start it. Remember, most schools do have anti-bullying policies that encompass bullying on Facebook. Not everything you say on Facebook will be interpreted the way you want it to. Unless you are able to explain to your closest friends what you actually meant, it is probably a good idea to play it safe. Keep in mind; the easiest way to avoid problems online is to simply click ‘delete.’ There is a false sense of security and confidence that overcomes people while online and because of this anonymity, people believe it’s okay to say hurtful things. I hate drama as much as anyone else and when it comes to Facebook, I have a rule: if its something you wouldn’t say in real life, don’t say it. Words can hurt a lot more than you realize and social media has just made it easier.                                                                                                                   {Source}

Everyone can see what you write on Facebook so be careful of what you write on your friend’s walls and what you message them. Don’t write things on your friends’ walls that you wouldn’t necessarily talk about in public –such as a birthday party that your other friend wasn’t invited to. Seeing your post about how awesome the party was where this friend can see it can cause feeling of regret. Take Tyler Clementi’s suicide for example. If those boys hadn’t posted that video online where everyone can see it, he probably wouldn’t have killed himself. Again, think before you speak.

I’ve always logged off of Facebook whenever I was getting fed up with all the digital drama. Don’t get me wrong: Facebook and other social networking sites can be greattools but when faced with notifications to check, statuses to update, pictures to post, and things to ‘like’ Facebook can easily end up adding to your stress instead of a way to deplete it. Every notification I received in my inbox became an added fifteen minutes to Facebook time and in the end, I just got sick of reading all the pointless comments or stupid updates. The best way to relieve you from social overload is to log off, something many teens forget to do.

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After almost a year on Facebook, I finally deactivated my account. I’ve now been Facebook-free for almost two months. What I’ve learned from Facebook is that while it can be helpful, most people don’t usually use it in that way. We might say we use Facebook to get coupons from our favorite store or to get in contact with family overseas, but this isn’t what we do on Facebook on a daily basis. If you think you can handle Facebook without going overboard, go for it but if you’re someone like me who loves wasting time doing nothing and piling up homework, it might be better to set some guidelines for yourself before you log on. Facebook isn’t going to tell you what you can and can’t do. It’s up to you, the user, to define the happy medium.

Teen Writer: Baaria Chaudhary

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My name is Baaria Chaudhary. I am sixteen years old, a junior in high school, and a headscarf-wearing Muslim. Writing is my passion and has been since I was eight years old, one of the reasons why I joined the Tots to Teens Writing Program. I love all kinds of writing from short stories and novels to English essays and articles for my school newspaper.  Writing is a way to express my opinions, my dreams, and myself, which is why I love it. In a way, writing is my drug, not marijuana. Other than my obsession with writing, I volunteered for this teen writers program in order to find out what its like to work for a real magazine. My dream job is being a journalist (Obviously, it involves a lot of writing!) and I believe that this is a way for me to understand what goes on behind the magazine. I hope this experience is enlightening as well as entertaining. I can’t wait to get started.

 

Suicide Prevention Month

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This month is suicide prevention month, and although it is a tough topic it is one we should all talk about.  On September 11th I was going through my Twitter thread and there I saw Cristi Comes a.k.a @MotherUnadorned tweet about being a #BlueBlogger.  She had dyed all of her hair blue, because she met her goal and raised money for suicide prevention.  I wanted to help; I wanted to be a part of bringing more attention to suicide prevention.  I tweeted her back to let her know I was on board.  This past Monday I too added blue to my hair.  But dying my hair blue was not enough I needed to share with you ways you too could help.

The American Foundation of Suicide Prevention takes donations to assist with founding programs and research for suicide prevention.

Walk to Save Lives

Network for Good gives you many organizations that accept donations for suicide prevention as well as where to volunteer.

Next I want to share why it has taken me a while to post this article.  I wanted to let you know how this topic has touched my life in a way I thought it never would.  How the pain affects so many after one person’s decision.

That Sunday when I agreed to become a Blue Blogger to spread awareness, I didn’t think I would have to feel the pain of a suicide attempt days later.  September 16th, I got the call from my best friend that her foster brother had tried to take his life, and he was in ICU. Needless to say this past week has been tough; we were all waiting for Robert to pull through.  I had never meet Robert, but here I was so closely intertwined.  I spoke to 13 year-old Robert over the phone miles away pleading for him to open his eyes and come back to us.  I just knew he had to pull through; he had already defied so many odds.

My past week went from painful to a whole new level of pain.  September 22nd we lost Robert, and I cannot describe how painful it was to hear.  This young man who had so much to live for, lost his life by his own hands. Why did he decide this was the way?  It pains me to even share that we lost a child last week–A CHILD.

The hurt that suicide puts on the hearts of many daily is never truly factored in.  I had to feel that pain and I wish I had not.  My best friend’s family are enduring the pain of having to burry a child and cope with his loss—I wish they were not.  They have to walk in the door daily and know he is no longer there, they will never see his smile, hear his laugh, and hug him close again.  That pain is unimaginable to many, but sadly this is the pain families all over the world deal with daily. A person dies by suicide every 16 minutes in the United States, claiming over 33,000 lives each year (AFSP).  I have been told Robert was a sweet young man; he built a birdhouse and watched birds come to his birdhouse.  He made a dollhouse bed for another child in the home.  Robert will be missed and he will always be loved.  Rest in Peace Robert we all love you.

 

 

 

Depression, Teens, and Facebook

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by Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC
There are recent reports concerning whether teen Facebook users experience an increase in depression. Researchers disagree whether this is a new type of depression or an extension of existing forms of depression. Teens with low self-esteem, school stress and family stress are vulnerable to depressions. The number of friends they have on Facebook, their status — as well as the status of their friends, and the constantly updated photos may add to a teen feeling self critical and not “popular” enough. It can also add to feeling ostracized, bullied, or teased.

Social networks help teens feel more connected. Social networks have become the place teens “hang out.” However, if that teen does not feel like they measure up to other teens, it can become a world of loneliness and a constant reminder of perceived shortcomings. In extreme cases, suicide notes have been posted on Facebook, which demonstrate the powerful connection teens feel toward their virtual and real friends. Social networks offer teens a skewed view of the real world and they don’t have the brain development to understand this is not the real world.

If the teen’s family is not engaged with the teen, the social network takes on a much more potent place in the teen’s world. In fact, it may become the child’s only world. Pediatricians are now encouraging parent’s to talk with their kids about being online and how to recognize depression caused by social media, cyber bullying, sexting and other online risks.

Ten signs your teen may be depressed:
1. Loss of interest in activities, hobbies and other things they
used to be very interested in.
2. More isolated — never see them with their friends anymore.
3. Sleeping all the time or up in the middle of the night because
they cannot sleep.
4. A loss or increase in appetite.
5. Notable weight loss or gain.
6. Lethargic or flat mood.
7. More irritable or easily frustrated.
8. A downward trend in grades.
9. Not wanting to go to school.
10. Weepy, labile moods.

If you see any of these signs with your teen and they last more than two weeks, it is time to talk to your teen and make an appointment with your pediatrician for an evaluation of depression. Depression is insidious and many times teens won’t know they are depressed until the depression lifts. Depression can kill, but it is also curable.

Signs your child may be the victim of cyber bullying:
Please note many of these signs mimic signs of depression. Parents should intervene right away when they see the below signs. Waiting two weeks may be too long.

1. Hesitant to be online; nervous when an instant message, text message or e-mail appears.
2. Visibly upset after using the computer or cell phone, or suddenly avoids it.
3. Hides or clears the computer screen, or closes their cellphone when you enter the room.
4. Spends unusual and/or longer hours online in a more tense pensive tone.
5. Withdraws from friends, falls behind in schoolwork or wants to avoid school.
6. Suddenly sullen, evasive, or withdrawn in personality or behavior.
7. Trouble sleeping, loss of appetite, excessively moody or crying.
8. Suspicious phone calls, e-mails and packages arrive at your home.
9. Possible drop in academic performance.

As parents, sometimes we need subtle ways to talk to our kids about social media. It is important to keep the lines of communication open and talk often to our kids about the dangers and the benefits of social media and other electronic communication.

If you are concerned in regards to talking to your child about the social media sites, sexting, and or cyberbullying here some simple conversations starters from TrueCare.net. True Care is a social media monitoring service for parents, for which I am an advisor. Hopefully, these questions and conversation starters will help you transform a quick after-school chat into an in-depth discussion about stress, popularity, depression and social media.

1. Has anyone ever emailed or posted something on Facebook that made you uncomfortable?
2. Do kids at your school ever talk about sending sexy photos to each other? Do you know anyone that does it? Why do you think they do it?
3. Have you heard about anyone that has been bullied online? What happened to them?
4. Has anyone you know gotten in trouble for being a bully online? What happened to them?
5. Did you hear about the girl who committed suicide because she was bullied online? Why do you think she did that? Do you think her parents saw a difference in her behavior?
6. What advice would you give a friend who told you they were being bullied on line?

It’s a new world out there, for parents as much as children. Get involved. Talk to your kids. Visit the sights they are visiting. Let them know you are there when they need you. The teen years are a relatively short amount of time, but decisions made during this time can change both you and your child’s life forever. Help your child make healthy choices .

Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC, is a licensed psychotherapist and co-author with Janine J. Sherman, of Start Talking: A Girl’s Guide for You and Your Mom About Health, Sex or Whatever. Read more about the book at www.StartTalkingBook.com and more about Rapini at www.maryjorapini.com.

Our Teen Writer Search is on!

Teen Writing Program

Teen Writing Program
Tots To Teens Magazine is on the search for teens that love to write and want to share with our readers their views on important subject matters relating to current events, school issues and social issues.   It will help to build self-esteem, confidence, and give students a place to voice their opinions and thoughts in a fun, yet safe environment.

This is a volunteer writing gig, and while you will not be getting paid for this, you will be able to use the Tots To Teens Magazine platform to share your thoughts and be heard, with some benefits along the way.

The Tots To Teens writing program will run from September 13, 2011 through May 29, 2012.  The writing program is open to teen’s aged 13-17.  You can select your own topic to write about or we can give you a list of current topics and you can pick from there.   You would be required to write at least 5-8 articles that we can share on our blog (that comes to about 1 article a month throughout the program timeframe).

If you decide to work with us through the entire program, we would be more than happy to write a letter on your behalf, which may be used when seeking out potential employers or schools.  You might even be able to gain extra credit from your middle school language arts teachers but that will need to be discussed between you and your teacher, we can also speak to them if you’d like.

If you would like more information on our teen writing program, please email us at editor@totstoteensmagazine.com

Move over Twilight?

The Twilight Saga may have some competition– The Hunger Games?  Twilight has had teens and adults on the edge of their seats waiting for Breaking Dawn, which comes out in 160 days (November 18, 2011).  However, teens and Adults may have a new book-to-movie adaption to pine over… The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins.

The are no vampires or werewolves, but there is plenty of action in The Hunger Games.  The Hunger Games is based in the future with 24 teenagers competing on reality show.  However, this is not the Jersey Shore think Survivor or MTV’s The Challenge.

Survival of the fittest

Katniss Everdeen is the lead charter in the book, who will be played by Jennifer Lawerence in the movie.

Katniss’s takes the place of her little sister, who is chosen to be entered into The Hunger Games.

What is theThe Hunger Games- two tributes (one boy & one girl) are drafted from each of the twelve districts to be brought to an arena and fight to the death and it is all televised.  Modern Day gladiator with stylist and support team?

Love Triangle

Yes, for those of you that loved Team Edward of Team Jacob and wished you were Bella… sounds like the movie is going to have Katniss  in the middle of two handsome gentlemen.

There is already debate if The Hunger Games is better than Twilight, nevertheless we will have to wait till Spring 2012 for the movie, but you can go pick up the books now….

Happy Summer Reading-

Prom Shoes $35 and Under

Cinderella needs her slippers– just make sure they are not glass or clear.

This year try wooden hills– yes wooden heels are not just for casual wear.  With this look you will be able to take these shoes into summer with a cute dress or jeans.

Qupid Saydie 25 Black T Strap Wrapped Platform Wooden Heels  - Click Image to Close

Qupid Saydie Black T Strap Wooden Platform $35 @ Lulu's.com

Neutral Pumps or Neutral Peep Toes have been worn all over Hollywood and are ready to make their debut at Prom 2011

Delicious Scuba Dark Beige Patent Peep Toe Double Platform Pumps  - Click Image to Close

Beige Patent Peep Toe $31 @Lulu's

Jeweled and Metallic Pumps replace the old glass slipper in a big way

Speed Limit 98 Jones Gold Glitter Platform Pumps  - Click Image to Close

Speed Limit 98 Jones Gold Glitter Platform $30 @Lulu's.com

Smoke Leopard Heels $24.80 @ Forever21

Bow Heels— cute meets sassy.

Pleated Satin Open Toes $24.80 @ Forever 21

Anne Michelle Hustler 10 Silver Bow Tie Platform Pumps  - Click Image to Close

Anne Michelle Hustler 10 Silver Bow Tie Platform $33 @ Lulu's.com

What’s your shoe style?

Accessorize Prom 2011

This week we took a look at the hottest Prom hair trends for 2011, Prom dresses on a budget and without, now it is time to accessorize.

Accessories can make any outfit

We all know what makes the little black dress…. accessories.  I have searched the Internet for the best accessories for Prom 2011 and I have to say these finds are amazing.  This year headbands, feathers, bangles, metallics, and as always sparkle– are on the list of trends.

Hair needs love to

Prom 2011 hair gets some attention with headbands and feathers, worn down or in a ponytail.  I went to the handmade community for these great finds under $20

Jade Feather Headband $19 by LiveinStyle on Etsy

Amber Bead Sequin Headband $20 by LiveinStyle on Etsy

Sweet Pea Headband $13 by Crafteemcgee on Etsy

Chocolate Peony Clip $10 @ Crafteemcgee on Etsy

Spiral Flower Crystal Hair comb $9.99 @ Amazon

Earrings under $20 perfect for prom

I'm a Be-Leaf-er Gold Earrings  - Click Image to Close

Shiny Leaf Earrings $15 @ Lulu's

Rhinestone Hearts $5.80 @ Forever 21

Antique Silver Tone ~ Blue Rhinestone Encrusted Key Dangle Earrings

Blue Rhinestone Encrusted Key Dangle Earrings $6.98 @ Amazon

Rockstar Royalty Earrings $5.80 @ Forever21

SILVER

Rhinestone Teardrop Earring $19 @ Arden B

Bangles and bib necklaces are in this prom….

Under $20

Floral Panel Bracelet $7.80 @ Forever21

Forever 21

Acrylic Diamond Alloy Metal Peacock Bangle $3.99 @ Amazon

GOLD

Mixed Chain Layered Necklace $14.49 @ Arden B

BLACK

Wrapped Bib Necklace $16.99 @ Arden B

No big boho bags for prom try a clutch with character.

Consider one of these clutches at Boxed Gifts for only $16.99

Don’t think I forgot the shoes!  I have some great shoes to show you–tomorrow.

Tell me what you think– is there something in this post you just have to have prom or no prom?

Special thanks to: LiveInStyleCrafteemcgee for allowing me to share their beautiful handmade creations.


Budgetless Prom Dresses

Yesterday we looked at Prom dresses on a budget— now let’s take a peek at Prom dresses without a budget.

Most of these dresses came from the lovely ladies at Diane & Company in New Jersey

You can also find one of the most expensive prom dresses at www.dressgoddess.com as well as many other beautiful dresses.

Enjoy!

Tony Bowls $398 @Diane & Company

Xtreme Prom $258 @ Diane & Company

GiGi $218

Tony Bowls Short $258

B’Dazzle Plus $320

Jovani Short $320

Jasz 4211

Jasz 4211 $238 @ www.dressgoddess.com

Sherri Hill 2304

Sherri Hill $350 @ www.dressgoddess.com

$13997 Prom Dress

Guess the price for this prom dress?

$13,997

What do you think?

Are you thinking the budget dresses can be just as glam with the right accessories?  Tomorrow I will show off some lovely accessories I found online for under $20.